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Jan 09

Hey Microsoft Word, I want ‘u’ back.

The thought came to me out of the blue. It simply occurred to me how miserable my life had become without ‘u’. When I was a kid, the word ‘colour’ seemed so much more beautiful, so full of life. Similar was the case with ‘flavour’,’neighbour’,’honour’ and a countless other expressions. But all that changed once I had come in to face a world without ‘u’. The words ‘color’,’flavor’,’neighbor’ and ‘honor’ simply seemed to have lost their magical flavour (or should I say, have lesser ‘flavor’)”. But why should that happen? After some hard thinking and quiet retrospection, I found the answer staring at me right from the screen. The words with ‘u’ were highlighted with a red underline. That is, they were either misspelled, ambiguous or from a different culture. It hit me right then that inside me was just another fighting spirit. And what was it fighting ? Nothing other than the great American English Tsunami.

It had all started rather innocuously enough, with a platform called Windows developed by Microsoft. The program was called Microsoft Word and it simply took ‘u’ out of your English. The Americans in their endeavour (o_O…..stop showing that nonsensical ‘endeavor’) to dominate the world, were cunning enough to know that all they had to do was vanquish the ‘u’ from the World Wide Web. And now they have conquered your desktop with their latest polished version of Microsoft Word. Most of you may have never noticed it, many of you won’t bother about it, and almost all of you will laugh at it, but I view my statement as a war. The war to rid the world of American colonialism. The war to reclaim a corruption free English. The war to get the ‘u’ and ‘re’ back. A war to kick out the ‘er’ of this specter called American English. Just start by writing color with the ‘u’. Doesn’t it look so colourful ?